{"id":30,"date":"2017-01-22T20:49:15","date_gmt":"2017-01-22T20:49:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/?page_id=30"},"modified":"2017-02-28T16:25:27","modified_gmt":"2017-02-28T16:25:27","slug":"babysitting","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/babysitting\/","title":{"rendered":"Babysitting"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I\u00a0am\u00a0sitting\u00a0in\u00a0the\u00a0wrong\u00a0room\u00a0listening<br \/>\nFor\u00a0the\u00a0wrong\u00a0baby.\u00a0I\u00a0don\u2019t\u00a0love<br \/>\nThis\u00a0baby.\u00a0She\u00a0is\u00a0sleeping\u00a0a\u00a0snuffly<br \/>\nRoseate,\u00a0bubbling\u00a0sleep;\u00a0she\u00a0is\u00a0fair;<br \/>\nShe\u00a0is\u00a0a\u00a0perfectly\u00a0acceptable\u00a0child.<br \/>\nI\u00a0am\u00a0afraid\u00a0of\u00a0her.\u00a0If\u00a0she\u00a0wakes<br \/>\nShe\u00a0will\u00a0hate\u00a0me.\u00a0She\u00a0will\u00a0shout<br \/>\nHer\u00a0hot\u00a0midnight\u00a0rage,\u00a0her\u00a0nose<br \/>\nWill\u00a0stream\u00a0disgustingly\u00a0and\u00a0the\u00a0perfume<br \/>\nOf\u00a0her\u00a0breath\u00a0will\u00a0fail\u00a0to\u00a0enchant\u00a0me.<\/p>\n<p class=\"poemBlack\"><span class=\"poemBlack\">To\u00a0her\u00a0I\u00a0will\u00a0represent\u00a0absolute<br \/>\nAbandonment.\u00a0For\u00a0her\u00a0it\u00a0will\u00a0be\u00a0worse<br \/>\nThan\u00a0for\u00a0the\u00a0lover\u00a0cold\u00a0in\u00a0lonely<br \/>\nSheets;\u00a0worse\u00a0than\u00a0for\u00a0the\u00a0woman\u00a0who\u00a0waits<br \/>\nA\u00a0moment\u00a0to\u00a0collect\u00a0her\u00a0dignity<br \/>\nBeside\u00a0the\u00a0bleached\u00a0bone\u00a0in\u00a0the\u00a0terminal\u00a0ward.<br \/>\nAs\u00a0she\u00a0rises\u00a0sobbing\u00a0from\u00a0the\u00a0monstrous\u00a0land<br \/>\nStretching\u00a0for\u00a0milk\u2013familiar\u00a0comforting,<br \/>\nShe\u00a0will\u00a0find\u00a0me\u00a0and\u00a0between\u00a0us\u00a0two<br \/>\nIt\u00a0will\u00a0not\u00a0come.\u00a0It\u00a0will\u00a0not\u00a0come.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"poemBlack\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"100%\" height=\"166\" scrolling=\"no\" frameborder=\"no\" src=\"https:\/\/w.soundcloud.com\/player\/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fapi.soundcloud.com%2Ftracks%2F309966970&auto_play=false&hide_related=false&visual=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&color=ff5500\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p class=\"poemBlack\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/notes-about-baby-sitting\/\">Notes&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I\u00a0am\u00a0sitting\u00a0in\u00a0the\u00a0wrong\u00a0room\u00a0listening For\u00a0the\u00a0wrong\u00a0baby.\u00a0I\u00a0don\u2019t\u00a0love This\u00a0baby.\u00a0She\u00a0is\u00a0sleeping\u00a0a\u00a0snuffly Roseate,\u00a0bubbling\u00a0sleep;\u00a0she\u00a0is\u00a0fair; She\u00a0is\u00a0a\u00a0perfectly\u00a0acceptable\u00a0child. I\u00a0am\u00a0afraid\u00a0of\u00a0her.\u00a0If\u00a0she\u00a0wakes She\u00a0will\u00a0hate\u00a0me.\u00a0She\u00a0will\u00a0shout Her\u00a0hot\u00a0midnight\u00a0rage,\u00a0her\u00a0nose Will\u00a0stream\u00a0disgustingly\u00a0and\u00a0the\u00a0perfume Of\u00a0her\u00a0breath\u00a0will\u00a0fail\u00a0to\u00a0enchant\u00a0me. To\u00a0her\u00a0I\u00a0will\u00a0represent\u00a0absolute Abandonment.\u00a0For\u00a0her\u00a0it\u00a0will\u00a0be\u00a0worse Than\u00a0for\u00a0the\u00a0lover\u00a0cold\u00a0in\u00a0lonely Sheets;\u00a0worse\u00a0than\u00a0for\u00a0the\u00a0woman\u00a0who\u00a0waits A\u00a0moment\u00a0to\u00a0collect\u00a0her\u00a0dignity Beside\u00a0the\u00a0bleached\u00a0bone\u00a0in\u00a0the\u00a0terminal\u00a0ward. As\u00a0she\u00a0rises\u00a0sobbing\u00a0from\u00a0the\u00a0monstrous\u00a0land Stretching\u00a0for\u00a0milk\u2013familiar\u00a0comforting, She\u00a0will\u00a0find\u00a0me\u00a0and\u00a0between\u00a0us\u00a0two It\u00a0will\u00a0not\u00a0come.\u00a0It\u00a0will\u00a0not\u00a0come.\u00a0 Notes&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-30","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P8lhFD-u","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/30","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=30"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/30\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":501,"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/30\/revisions\/501"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.gillianclarke.co.uk\/gc2017\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=30"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}